Waiting and planning has never been my thing. I’m a bit rubbish at it, if I’m honest. I can empathise a lot with my two year old when he wants things NOW NOW NOW as frankly that’s how I feel most of the time.
But I’m working on it.
A few months ago I fell in love with a beautiful pair of shoes. Just the right shade of green, with enough of a heel to give me height but not totter, a perfect curve of platform and toe, oh I was smitten. But, dear reader, I walked away. And then back. And then away again.
I was on an economy drive and I have dozens of beautiful shoes. But the memory of them lingered, and I spent many a moment wistfully recalling the way they cushioned my feet while lifting my calves, how the suede felt against my fingers and how they would go perfectly with my green top. I didn’t regret not buying them, knowing from experience as I do that the fleeting rush of a shiny new purchase doesn’t stack up against the hollow black fog of mounting debt. But I did often think of them.
Life went on, as it does, and the memory faded. And then, on a boot-finding mission in the sales yesterday, there they were. Like manna from heaven. I’m sure there was a parting of clouds and a chorus of trumpets as I crossed the store to pick them up, one pair, in my size, HALF PRICE.
The shopping gods were on my side yesterday. Praise be.
And I actually think the delayed gratification aspect of the purchase made it all the sweeter.
I need to start applying that to all areas of my life. Our lives are about to change massively for the better because the long term savings we have paid into forever have finally matured. I’m crap at saving, as a rule, but this was Enforced Saving in that it came out of our bank every month (in an eyewatering amount) and was locked away in an untouchable account. We regretted it sometimes, in the doldrums of mounting bills and a too small house, but now it’s finally time to reap the rewards we are congratulating ourselves massively for a sensible plan. Aren’t we clever? Don’t shit your own ears off, we are occasionally quite sensible.
We had always planned to move house around now, but being the NOW NOW NOW person that I am I have spent the last few years obsessively scouring Rightmove and trying to fast forward time. Can you imagine the Tigger-esque vibe in this house now that we are actually in the process? There is every chance my head might bounce off.
Delayed gratification is my new thing, I’ve decided I like the feeling. I’m now all about planning for the future and putting things off until an appropriate time, instead of steamrollering ahead and grabbing at life with both fists. Well. We’ll see.